Right. I’ve really thrown myself into my Doctor Who since The Impossible Astronaut, which is actually paying off because I haven’t had so many readers for a blog entry in all years I’ve been writing blogs. The replies have been mainly positive and most agreed with what I had to say about the plot being a tad complex, apart from Alex Marion who was showing off his inner geek. Nothing to be proud of son.
So twice in a row I managed to see the episode as they came out on the TV as normal people get to see them on a normal Saturday Night. Like the villains in Doctor Who, this is alien to me. My gig didn’t start till 8pm and I knew I could get to my gig by 7.30 as long as I had my boots on and my crap packed ready to go. This included the suit bag, matching shirt and tie combo and cufflinks loaned to me by Mike Manera for my wedding. I also got out a pork goulash and rice from the freezer and stuck a few sausages under grill to make sure I had a proper meal in me, rather than buying something overpriced and full of fat and salt later. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure after a few pints the fast food would taste divine, but I know in the long run eating the sensible way is the healthier and cheaper option in this uncertain economic climate. Even if there were sausages on the menu. Anyway I digest. Ha, see what I did there. Oh please yourselves. No, not like that, put it away.
WARNING CONTAINS SPOILERS
Well, once the sausages go down I will have to eat my hat with The Impossible Astronaut. As much as I found it confusing and a little lacklustre in places, it turns out it was just the first half of a brilliant opening story for the new series. I think Moffat must have read my blog about the landscape not really looking like America because in this episode there’s no mistaking the place. You don’t get that kind of scenery on Peckham Rye with a bit of Photoshop thrown in. Some of the sweeping scenes were breathtaking and is it me, but I can’t get used to the proper American accents. I’m so used to British TV having RADA types doing a dodgy New York or Texan drawl. Doctor Who is finally going global. Talking of dodgy accents, in series one there was plenty of people who went to the Dick Van Dyke school of old London cockney. But that’s for another blog entry.
I know it’s corny but it’s a great use of Area 51 and the Doctor is being treated how they would treat any alien they’d find. With fear, chained up and armed men all around. Speaking of which, one of the armed men was fellow comedian Tommy Campbell. He told me he was going to be in an episode but couldn’t say what happens. I told him I didn’t want to know anyway because the surprise would be more fun. And there he was with a big gun in his hand. Good man. My wife said to me, “Where have I seen him before?” Thinking he must be in Eastenders or something. I pointed out he was at a gig she went to a few weeks ago with her parents. I don’t think they were too impressed with “Dick Fan” material. Oh and the Doctor has been there so long he has a beard. Beards are cool. Trust me, they are. No they really are.
I don’t know about you but I though the markings on the bodies would have had something to do with The Impossible Planet and Satan’s Pit but those were just weird squiggles and these are bars of five drawn on the body. Damn you Moffat for making me see more than what’s there. The fact that both of the episodes have the word Impossible in them makes it all little more tasty and I won’t rule out a connection just yet.
River Song oh how I love you River Song. Such bare faced cheek of the woman. Jumping off a building on the off chance that Canton will tell the Doctor, so he would go back in time to save her is brilliant to say the least. Only five minutes into the episode and I’m giddy with happiness and full of pork. And how good was the flirting between the Doctor and River, much to the annoyance of Amy? Pissed off or jealous? Who knows? Tee hee, it’s more fun than an episode of Hollyaoks. Alright, crap analogy.
The children’s home was nice creepy touch. The crazy old guy writing on the walls but thinking it’s the children. And how odd The Silence want to make sure the little girl is looked after properly albeit in a weird way. I loved the scene when Canton shot The Silence. I’m tired of seeing films where these ancient monsters are invincible against modern weaponry. Play any computer game especially Castle Wolfenstein and you’ll see human weapons can put pink frilly knickers on any monster then spank it’s arse and call it Judy.
Now rethinking The Lodger I can now see that the spaceship in the flat is abandoned due to the fact that the human race has killed off The Silence. So that makes the story in The Lodger an old remnant from times long gone. So as I get my head around it, The Lodger is a prelude that takes place after the event of the main story. Very cool Mr Moffat. I should never have doubted you.
So here’s the big question. Who the little girl? Were The Silence trying to make a Timelord? Did they find one? But shouldn’t the Doctor be able to sense if there’s another Timelord in the universe? Rani? River Song? Romana? They all begin with R. Are they all one and the same? Or it could just obviously be Amy’s baby? But when the Doctor checks to see if she’s pregnant even the TARDIS can’t make its mind. The whole pregnancy thing seemed to have different connotations this time round. It’s obvious that she wants a bit of Timelord sausage, but have they done the beast with two backs? Did he give her one in the future and doesn’t know about it yet? The filthy hound.
I’m also warming to the Doctor and River Song meeting in reverse order. That was sad when she realized they’d never kiss again. She looked like she was still in the throws of nastiness. Maybe it’s their child. Perhaps the Doctor will repopulate the Timelord race with his loins. And who can blame him, how sexy was she when she spun around killing The Silence? How sexy was she drying her wet self down with a towel? It certainly gave me a semi. However I have to admit I’m a little unsure as to why The Silence are such a threat, I mean yes they’re everywhere and that means they see you have a poo and they gawp as you get aroused by the shower section in the Argos catalogue, but apart from acute embarrassment is that a crime? Well yes, being a peeping tom is a crime, but it’s hardly Third Reich stuff. I’m sure we’ll find out by the end of the series.
There were also a few flashbacks of series 5 and who was that woman with the eye patch? It was like Amy was asleep and that was her way of seeing a medical person checking on her. I blame Lost for this kind of thing. Let’s answer some questions and leave a shed load to ponder over. I think in viewing figure this won’t be a hugely successful series as it will be getting too complex to tune in halfway through, but it could be the most artistically rewarding for fans.
My last thought. If you’re going to keep a written tally of anything, isn’t it a bit pointless to write on your face?
Next week it’s pirates. Ah har!
8 out of 10